The Weight of Weariness
““Though youths grow weary and tired, And vigorous young men stumble badly,
Yet those who wait for the LORD Will gain new strength;
They will mount up with wings like eagles,
They will run and not get tired,
They will walk and not become weary.”
”
Are you familiar with this verse above?
I don’t know about you, but I’ve been experiencing a growing weariness during this season. And it makes me wonder about how God actually expects us to gain His strength in weary seasons.
It is redundant to say the words COVID, pandemic, race issues, election, riots, on and on. In my recent conversations, I’m noticing how, for many, the shock and unbelief of our circumstances in 2020 has dissipated and given way to a deep well of weariness. Weary of questions. Weary of news. Weary of updates. Changes. Regulations. Masks. Distance. Division. Opinions. Fear.
It’s like the skills we’ve used to survive the last year are revealing their fruits in the new year, and, despite the multifaceted ways we’ve coped with worldwide change, and despite our best intentions, a similar fruit arises across our culture: weariness.
It’s so much easier nowadays to relate to the words below from Moses, recorded in Psalm 90. Remember, Israel had spent 40 years following God through a desert wilderness. Moses watched God’s people die one by one while they waited for the promised land. A whole generation would be lost before they entered those sacred promises and finally arrive “home”.
“You have placed our iniquities before You, Our secret sins in the light of Your presence.
For all our days have declined in Your fury; We have finished our years like a sigh.
As for the days of our life, they contain seventy years, Or if due to strength, eighty years,
Yet their pride is but labor and sorrow; For soon it is gone and we fly away....
So teach us to number our days, That we may present to You a heart of wisdom.
”
Can you hear Moses’s weariness as he writes? And He knows God deeply, personally. In Exodus, the Scripture records, “The LORD used to speak to Moses face to face, just as a man speaks to his friend,” (Exodus 33:11 NASB). So, is this how God treats His friends?
Are the friends of God made to endure weariness? What is going on here?
And if so, how does this fit with the Isaiah 40 scripture above that promises renewal, restoration, and reviving for the weary?
Lets press into this together. Weariness is defined as:
extreme tiredness; fatigue.
reluctance to see or experience any more of something.
That second definition stands out in our current season.
What is it that you are not just tired of, but feel “reluctance to see or experience any more” of it?
In which area of life currently, is your heart saying “No more. I’m done. I can’t take it.”
What are you facing that triggers you to exhaustion, to just want to throw your hands up in the air and walk out?
That is weariness.
The first step in dealing with weariness is to recognize it. Good job. Pat yourself on the back. You did it.
Did you know that in Hebrew the word wait (quaval), as Isaiah 40:30 says, “They who wait for the Lord shall renew their strength…they shall run and not be weary,” that word “wait” (quaval) can be translated “bear”, as in bear a burden? It can also mean to “gather”, as in take account, find all the things, and add them up—bear them—and bring them to a certain place, or bind them together like a rope.
As you recognize these areas of weariness, you’re actually taking account, adding up, and consciously lifting these burdens together. Therapists call this self-awareness. And sometimes it hurts to add it up. Like the Psalmist, we pray, “Search me, O God, know my heart, try me, know my anxious thoughts, see if there be any hurtful way in me, and lead me in your everlasting way,” (Psalm 139:23-24). Be encouraged, though it may feel heavy, this first step does lead somewhere. In God’s hands, these feelings are the beginning of healing.
The second step to dealing with weariness is to throw away what isn’t working. This may be a number of things, depending on how much you’re carrying. But the quickest way to access this is, as you total the burden, asking yourself:
What isn’t working?
What’s an added burden?
What are major patterns I notice?
What can be thrown away?
In the Old Testament, God uses an image that was familiar to the agrarian culture of the day. In sorting wheat, they would gather the dry stalks in bunches, bring them into a shed and, with a tool, toss the sheaves in the air. The heavy, valuable wheat would fall to the ground, but the “chaff,” the unusable, unbakeable, worthless stuff would fly away in the wind.
After a bit of sorting, the wheat would sit in fresh, beautiful, golden piles, and the chaff would be gone. In this way, they would find out what was valuable in their burden they carried in, and what was to be tossed away as trash.
This powerful image is a metaphor on many levels, but we can apply it to weariness. What in this weight of weariness is a valuable grain or wheat? And what is a waste? What is added work? Added exhaustion? What doesn’t belong in the life of your soul? You may not be able to change the World circumstances, and it can be slow to change our individual circumstances, but some good old fashion honestly and humility will greatly ease our current build-up of burdens.
It may be as simple as distractions, worry, or habits of fear. Or it may be other addictions or patterns of control. This may be bitterness or regret. This may be judgment or isolation. It may be stubborn independence or just a fear of being seen/known.
What is it that is hindering you?
Whatever it is, as you take account, consider these areas of waste with the Lord. How can He help you with this? Perhaps He’ll put His finger on an area you may not immediately recognize. What is God speaking to You as you take account? It would be very wearisome to miss His voice and power as You process, wouldn’t it?
Lastly, speak to God out of the weariness. Turn your heart and your mind toward what You know of Him, toward Him as a personal presence in your life. When we cut off what isn’t working, it becomes clear what is working. Especially when we’re talking to our Creator, who made us, and made our days.
What are the areas that are bringing life right now?
What is worth celebrating? What are the small things? What are the big ones?
What has been causing your soul to turn to God, to connect with Him in this season?
Now, nourish yourself on those. Now. Just begin to worship God for those places of life. Those gifts from Him.
Ask yourself, how can I build this nourishment more deeply into my habits, my routine?
How can I press more deeply into these life-giving things?
Share this with God in a prayer. Adjust your calendar. Lean into what God is doing.
This isn’t to gloss over what isn’t working, nor is it to ignore what needs to be done. Lament has its place, a needed place in our worship. This is when we identify the lingering chaff with God and its affects on our soul in the midst of life-circumstances that often seem so opposite to the abundant life we know He promises. This act of bringing our worst pains before God’s presence is a vulnerable and sacred act.
And so, perhaps lament is the place where you sense an invitation from Him? And, if that is the case, linger there with Him for a bit. But, if weariness is truly deep in your bones, then you’ll need to take the next step and, alongside your laments, feed yourself on God’s Life once more.
This isn’t an instant fix. Israel needed God’s manna bread everyday in the wilderness, a daily necessity that turned their eyes to God in the midst of unchanging circumstances. Even Jesus said, “Man does not live on bread alone, but on every word that proceeds from the mouth of God.”
Take the time to commit to restore your soul with the Lord. It’s so important to God that He sent Jesus to die for your soul. You can trust you are obeying Him when you’re caring well for this heart He’s given you. This heart that He so dearly loves.
Remember, Jesus came into the weary world.
When He said “Come to me all who are weary,” He added, “Take My yoke” and “Learn from Me.” Because of Jesus, you aren’t alone in weariness. You will have a burden, but it’s not yours, it’s His. And your burdens are shouldered by Him. This close relationship becomes a way of learning, growing, and knowing God deeper.
Weariness is a fruit, not just of living, but of living apart from God in a world that is systemically structured to live independent of Him. Moses was right. Psalm 90 speaks truth, and, if you read the rest of Moses’s Psalm, you’ll see as Moses lived through plagues and trials, He continually takes shelter in God Almighty, asking God to cut off what isn’t working and dive into the Life that He alone provides.
And this same relational invitation is clear in Isaiah 40 (our beginning Scripture). God was speaking to a deeply weary people, in a weary world, and invites them in their waiting to shift their hope. “For hope deferred makes the heart grow sick,” (Proverbs 13:12). This is a call to align their hearts again with the flow of Life that God provides.
Take a few minutes to reconsider the Scripture below from Isaiah 40 in context.
See how God wants to speak to your weary soul.
And pay attention to His invitation to you into whatever is next…
“Why would you ever complain, O Jacob, or, whine, Israel, saying,
“GOD has lost track of me. He doesn’t care what happens to me”?
Don’t you know anything? Haven’t you been listening?
GOD doesn’t come and go. God lasts. He’s Creator of all you can see or imagine. He doesn’t get tired out, doesn’t pause to catch his breath.
And he knows everything, inside and out. He energizes those who get tired, gives fresh strength to dropouts.
For even young people tire and drop out, young folk in their prime stumble and fall.
But those who wait upon GOD get fresh strength.
They spread their wings and soar like eagles,
They run and don’t get tired, they walk and don’t lag behind.”
Lyrics
“It’s quiet
In this house upon a hill
You won’t mind it
Some things you can’t know ‘til you’re still
In the silence
Where your spinning thoughts slow down
In the stillness
Things have a way of working out
Allow me to introduce myself again
I’m the one that knew you before time began
I’ve been waiting for you to let me be your friend
Everything you ever need is everything I am
I am
Take your chances
There’s nothing here to lose
Ask your questions
I promise you the truth
As you’re ready
I wanna hear your heart
Is it heavy?
Where wounds have left a mark
Allow me to introduce myself again
I was with you every place you’ve ever been
I’m the one that held you when you couldn’t stand
If you’re wondering who can heal your brokenness
I can
I can
I’ll meet you
In the house upon the hill
How I want to
Show you I am real
Allow me to introduce myself again
I’m the love you used to think could not exist
I’m as sure as where you’re standing and as free as the wind
You don’t have to reach for me, ‘cause this is where I am
I am
I am”
